Storm in a Teacup

Alternative titles:
"How you're misunderstanding my point"
"The man-hating feminazi is talking again"
"TL;DR"
"Men Aren't Funny EVER"


On occasion, though not regularly, I listen to a podcast that you can find on the S.I.R (Smodcast Internet Radio) network, called Tell'Em Steve Dave (TESD). I don't listen all the time because there's about 20 podcasts I love and I just don't have the time to listen to them all, so I triage and listen to random episodes of various things.

I listen to TESD because I like Kevin Smith and Kevin Smith likes these guys, so they must be alright.

Some of the folks from the TESD podcast are soon to be seen on American TV, in a show called Comic Book Men, which is a reality show about the goings on in a comic book shop called the Secret Stash. The Stash, as nerds call it, is owned (in part, I think, I don't know the business model) by Kevin Smith and is a bit of a Mecca for the fans of Mr Smith and his various movies. It sells comics and quality merch and has various movie props and such things. It's also where the podcast is recorded. I haven't been there personally, but I hear tell it's excellent. As a fan of both comics and merch I give the Stash a big two thumbs up.

Since the talk of the reality TV show has been flying around the internet there has been some talk about the lack of women in the show, and the fact there are no women starring in the show. Which has included some broader talk about how sexist the comic book industry is generally.

I would like to start my response by clearly stating a few of my own personal views:

1. Do I think that the title of the show is sexist?

To some extent, but it's not so sexist when considered on its own that I'd make a fuss about it. It's exclusionary, but to be fair it's a show about comic book men, and I really don't think the guys starring in the show have any say about the title so if I'm going to get annoyed about it I'll send a letter to AMC.

2. Do I think only starring guys is sexist?
To some extent, but like the title I don't really think that it's so much of an issue that I'd make a fuss on this alone. Auditions were held to have a women added to the show, and the decision was made that someone extra wouldn't fit in. That makes total sense to me. The guys running the shop and starring in the show have been friends for 20+ years and they have a chemistry. Adding someone new, male, female, alien would have messed up the dynamic. I get it, I really do. And as the guys from TESD have pointed out, it would have been pandering and it probably just wouldn't have worked. So I get it. There's going to be girls (customers) in the show, so it's not like they're going to just pretend that women don't exist anywhere in the world of comics.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I’d like to see more women in comic book stores, I’d like to see better representation of women as more than semi naked side-kicks and girlfriends in comics (in general, yes, there are some already, I want to see more), and I’d like to see more women in comic book stores so I wasn’t always dismissed as someone’s girlfriend when I buy comics, but I don’t think this show is the way to push that agenda if it’s not going to be natural, and it will ruin the existing dynamic of the guys running the shop.

So, let’s get down to what my issue is. And it isn't so much about the TV show, it's about the podcast, but the TV show was discussed on the latest episode of the podcast, episode 96 (available here http://smodcast.com/channels/tell-em-steve-dave/) and discussion of the TV show, and an online article about the TV show (available here http://www.newsarama.com/tv/hey-thats-my-cape-comic-book-men-120105.html) are why I'm a bit irked with the fellas from TESD.

These are my main reasons, in no particular order:

1. The author of the article, and another woman that auditioned for the show, were referred to as "cute". There was no discussion of their auditions, their geek cred, their love of comics, or their intelligence, they were just "cute". To be totally fair, one of the gentlemen did jump in at one point in the podcast and say "why is that relevant?". Why is it relevant? Referring to someone as cute, without any discussion of their merit outside of their looks is dismissive. As the conversation progressed it was added that nobody wants to see a hag on TV. The point was well made that the gentlemen that are going to be on TV aren't exactly male models (I'm paraphrasing all of this because I don’t want to re-listen to get exact quotes), and here comes the kicker. The reason I won’t re-listen and get exact quotes, "it's different for men". Yup...there you have it. If you want to be on TV, and you're a woman, you've got to be hot. No hags allowed.

2. This is, again, a paraphrase, but if you listen to the podcast you're going to find out that women aren't funny. None of them. "You don't find any women funny" "No". That's how it went. Now, let's say the opposite of that. I don't find any men funny. Not a one. I've met all the men in the world so I can say that with authority. It's not like Dane Cook and Kevin Smith have totally different comedic styles. No men, anywhere, ever, have ever been funny. It just doesn’t happen. Their jokes are all about how women nag and balls are uncomfortable and women be shopping. Amirite, ladies?

Sarcasm out of the way, Tina Fey and Roseanne are not the same. Their comedy is totally different. They’re both women, they both work in comedy, but they’re not the same. Sara Benincasa, one of my personal favourite “chicks that are funny” is totally different from Tina Fey or Roseanne.

Women are different. They’re not all the same. Their comedy routines are not all about being on the rag and how dumb men are. Sometimes they talk about those things to be sure, because menstruating, as a topic can make for some serious funny. I don't find Dane Cook’s oh so humorous observations about banging hookers with his mighty chainsaw like penis funny, but that doesn't mean I don't find any men funny. You can’t say all dudes aren’t funny just because Dane Cook isn’t funny, just as you can’t say all chicks aren’t funny because you don’t find Sarah Silverman funny.

Until you’ve met all the women in the world, you’re just going to have to not say that. Ever.

3. ‘If she wants to come in and show us her tits we’ll be here for the next two weeks”. I think that’s pretty close to the quote. But you know, it was a joke that came down to “olol show as your boobs lady”. Joke it was, I read the tone, I’m not stupid, I get that it was intended as funny.

But it wasn’t.

Jokes like this make women nothing but boobs, ass, legs. We’re more than that. The ladies that auditioned are more than that. The article that Jill wrote was smart and funny. And while I see that you could, if you were so inclined, to dismiss her as bitter for not being cast, that doesn’t mean she isn’t smart, and isn’t funny. I’ve read her articles, she’s both smart and funny. And has some hardcore geek cred. To limit her to a set of tits...come on dudes, it’s lazy.

So that’s the crux of it.

I have no issue with the name of the show when considered in isolation. I have no problems with the lack of female stars in the show when considered in isolation. But I have a problem with both those things when considered with the things that were said on episode 96 of the podcast, which leads to a troubling level of sexism and misogynistic language directed at women.

And that’s not even taking into consideration the very troubling behaviour of some of the TESD fans in reaction to this controversy. Which I understand cannot be controlled by the members of TESD and I don’t hold them responsible for that behaviour. I do think, however, that the lack of clarification of their position (which really needs to be longer than 140 characters) has resulted in some of their fans thinking they have free reign to bully and abuse women, because they perceive that is what the fine gentlemen of TESD would want them to do. I think that perception is incorrect, but I’m just a girl, what do I know.

A few disclaimers to wrap this up:

I am only speaking for myself. This whole response is my opinion and my opinion alone. I do not speak for my gender. I speak for myself.

I do not think that all members of the TESD are sexist. I do not know the members of TESD and I cannot speak to their attitudes towards women other than what I’ve heard via their podcast. I have no personal problem with any of the members of TESD and have no personal opinion about them as people since I’ve never met them.

I understand apologies have been made by Walt and Q via twitter and I have the greatest respect for the guts it takes to do that so publicly. Thumbs up.

Yes, I do understand I have a comma problem.

Please feel free to direct your disagreements to me, and me alone, via the comments or to my twitter @Ruthico . Though, if you're going to just say I'm a man hating lesbian maybe try and find a more original way of saying that, because it's kind of dull at this point.

Oh and hey, I took some nice pictures a year ago, take some time to check them out if you're here anyway.